Wednesday, September 24, 2008
what the feezie?!!
o-kay, i publish and then view my last post, and what do i find? all of my posts are waaay down the page! what's up with that?? please, somebody help!
just can't seem to shake it...
oh my goodness, I LOVE THIS SONG!!
Baby you can't go on
Wondering where you belong
Let me help you find yourself
'Cause you don't need nobody else
Ahh, you should be right here with me babe
Instead of going round this frantic town
And start messin' around
With all the lonely lonely people out there
No one to care
Why don't you come and stay with me
Because I love you so
You tell me you love me so
Why do you have to go
Everything you'll ever need
You will find right here with me
Ahh, you should be right here with me babe
Instead of going round this frantic town
And start messin' around
With all the lonely lonely people out there
No one to care
Why don't you come and stay with me
Because I love you so
Stay with me, Stay with me
Stay with me, Stay with me
Stay with me, Stay with me
Stay with me, Stay with me, Stay with me...
Ahh, you should be with me babe
Ahh, you shouldn't go no where
And all I'm trying to tell you babe
Happiness is waiting for you
So wont you stay with me?
So wont you stay with me?
I got what you need
So wont you stay with me?
Don't go nowhere baby,
don't go, no, no
I got what ya need
So wont you stay with me?
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
y'all remember that?? stay with me by de barge. this is one of those songs that wigs me out, even if i don't 'hear' it. i love this song so much that all it had to do was pop in my head last night, and it's been on ever since. it's ramadaan (mashALLAH), so i've been keeping away from the music [for the most part], concentrating more on playing the qur'aan. i broke down a little while ago though and tried to listen to a 30 second sample (yes, desperate, i know), to no avail; my speaker wouldn't work for some reason. that's what i get, right?.
that song though drives me mad- i can't even articulate what it does. it's like some deep-rooted, emotional/spiritual thing that makes me want to cry, and fall in love over and over again. kinda like that thing you feel when you get so overwhelmed by the sight of your child. and it's not just the music alone, nor the lyrics, but a combination of the two; it's just right on point! i love you de barge!!
Baby you can't go on
Wondering where you belong
Let me help you find yourself
'Cause you don't need nobody else
Ahh, you should be right here with me babe
Instead of going round this frantic town
And start messin' around
With all the lonely lonely people out there
No one to care
Why don't you come and stay with me
Because I love you so
You tell me you love me so
Why do you have to go
Everything you'll ever need
You will find right here with me
Ahh, you should be right here with me babe
Instead of going round this frantic town
And start messin' around
With all the lonely lonely people out there
No one to care
Why don't you come and stay with me
Because I love you so
Stay with me, Stay with me
Stay with me, Stay with me
Stay with me, Stay with me
Stay with me, Stay with me, Stay with me...
Ahh, you should be with me babe
Ahh, you shouldn't go no where
And all I'm trying to tell you babe
Happiness is waiting for you
So wont you stay with me?
So wont you stay with me?
I got what you need
So wont you stay with me?
Don't go nowhere baby,
don't go, no, no
I got what ya need
So wont you stay with me?
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
Don't go, Don't go, I love you so
y'all remember that?? stay with me by de barge. this is one of those songs that wigs me out, even if i don't 'hear' it. i love this song so much that all it had to do was pop in my head last night, and it's been on ever since. it's ramadaan (mashALLAH), so i've been keeping away from the music [for the most part], concentrating more on playing the qur'aan. i broke down a little while ago though and tried to listen to a 30 second sample (yes, desperate, i know), to no avail; my speaker wouldn't work for some reason. that's what i get, right?.
that song though drives me mad- i can't even articulate what it does. it's like some deep-rooted, emotional/spiritual thing that makes me want to cry, and fall in love over and over again. kinda like that thing you feel when you get so overwhelmed by the sight of your child. and it's not just the music alone, nor the lyrics, but a combination of the two; it's just right on point! i love you de barge!!
Thursday, September 04, 2008
RAMADAAN MUBARAK!
SubhanALLAH, Ramadaan is here! This is our 4th day in, and I'm lovin' it. I can't really say why; there's just something about Ramadaan. People who don't observe it's fast [etc.] may think that it's a struggle or burden, but it really isn't- not for me or my friends/family. In fact (and many of you can vouch for me), many times when we break fast we are not even in a rush to eat. We have to of course because we know our bodies have rights over us. My point though is that there's no feeling of deprivation or anything.
Then let us not forget Ramadaan is not just about 'doing without'. The point is to elevate ourselves back to the state in which we were created, via our father Adam. Fasting from food, drink, intercourse, as well as focusing more on charity, helping those who at the time may be struggling a little harder, etc. uplifts us spiritually, and focuses the attention where it needs to be: with the One Creator, ALLAH. Yet this month is meant to be a stepping stone, a template to how we should be- and in fact are ordered to be- throughout the rest of the year. InshALLAH, we will accept the hikma (wisdom) in it and live it consistently (Amin).
I'd like to say this Ramadaan is even more special to me because my sister has come back to the deen (subhanALLAH!). She hasn't been 'practicing' for a long time, but decided enough was enough for her, and has been getting up for suhur, making her salaah, and even plans to start back dressing modestly. I'm very proud of her.
Another thing I am grateful for is the fact that Ramadaan naturally enforces a communal bond, not just at the masjid (it's beautiful to see oodles of people praying, eating and playing together every night, especially with the weather being so pleasant), but within your personal circle. I truly enjoy getting up to prepare my family's suhur, and calling around to wake up other family/friends. (How often can you phone someone 4 in the morning, and it's all good??) It's a beautiful thing, and I'm just glad I was chosen to be a part of it. ALLAH certainly does give th ebest gifts, no?
Then let us not forget Ramadaan is not just about 'doing without'. The point is to elevate ourselves back to the state in which we were created, via our father Adam. Fasting from food, drink, intercourse, as well as focusing more on charity, helping those who at the time may be struggling a little harder, etc. uplifts us spiritually, and focuses the attention where it needs to be: with the One Creator, ALLAH. Yet this month is meant to be a stepping stone, a template to how we should be- and in fact are ordered to be- throughout the rest of the year. InshALLAH, we will accept the hikma (wisdom) in it and live it consistently (Amin).
I'd like to say this Ramadaan is even more special to me because my sister has come back to the deen (subhanALLAH!). She hasn't been 'practicing' for a long time, but decided enough was enough for her, and has been getting up for suhur, making her salaah, and even plans to start back dressing modestly. I'm very proud of her.
Another thing I am grateful for is the fact that Ramadaan naturally enforces a communal bond, not just at the masjid (it's beautiful to see oodles of people praying, eating and playing together every night, especially with the weather being so pleasant), but within your personal circle. I truly enjoy getting up to prepare my family's suhur, and calling around to wake up other family/friends. (How often can you phone someone 4 in the morning, and it's all good??) It's a beautiful thing, and I'm just glad I was chosen to be a part of it. ALLAH certainly does give th ebest gifts, no?
Friday, August 29, 2008
back in the work field
sistas [all nationalities]:
have you ever felt like you do everything you can for your children and husband- making sure their needs are met, their dreams fulfilled- and you think to yourself that you are truly satisfied living in that role.
then one day you realize that [just how the older, wiser women warned] your children are growing (some leaving), your husband doesn't necessarily appreciate you in the way you feel you deserve, and aside from raising smart, respectful, ready-for-the-world children, you have virtually nothing. no fly business that you always thought you would have, no money to call your own, no degree that you were supposed to go back and get, no just-for-you accomplishments- besides the ones that came before hubby and children.
you look up and realize that although you FEEL [and probably THINK] you're still 25... your not. it dawns on you that even if you live to be 80, 80 isn't really that far off. you can remember 20 years ago as if it were merely 2 MONTHS ago, and you know for sure that if you do have until 80, the next 40 or 30 years will likely zoom by just as quickly. and what if your husband dies or leaves you, or your children grow up and eventually leave home? then what??
the panic kicks in, and while some of us actually get up off of our tails and do something, some of us don't.
obviously i am not simply throwing some arbitrary question out at you; i have owned this plight for quite some time. thankfully though, i was able to build up the strength and courage to join ranks with the former gals: i got up off of my butt and went back to work! i know this post probably makes me sound manic, but i'm not; i feel good. damn good, y'all! i had to find myself again because mu was m.i.a. i'm not that deep, so i know a whole lot of you feel where i'm coming from
and trust, i don't regret my choices of staying home with my babes, homeschooling, or even running [my husbands] restaurants because not only did i ask ALLAH for all of these things, but they benefitted us all. of course, the children being able to spend quality time with me and each other was tremendously beneficial on too many levels to even name, and homeschooling opened them up to worlds they never would have known in private or public school sectors. and while the restaurants liked to have broke a sista down (big-ups to all you restauranteurs out there!), it taught me business hands-on, and gave me confidence that i could not only cook for other people[and have them love and even pay for it!], but also teach them how to cook for themselves (2 businesses that i've started on my own).
oh, and one of the many things homeschooling has done for me (besides make me smarter, and a HUGE history buff) is teach me how to teach others. which brings me finally to the point of this post: i am back at the school i used to work, teaching grades 4, 5 and 7 (general ed.), as well as high school health. it is a private muslim school, and i'm very excited. when i worked there before the students/parents/administration liked my style of teaching, and over the past few years have asked me to consider coming back. it was really challenging at times, and (for the past year) i was trying to take some time off at home, not bogging the children down to one place while i worked. and so i REALLY debated going back, but i'm glad i did. the best thing is that the children come to work with me, so i don't have to stress about getting to the sitter before making it to work, and the 2 older ones will be in my class so i will still be teaching them.
to think, just a couple of weeks ago i was a borderline-desperate woman, and today... i can see mu breaking thru. isn't it something what prayer can do?
have you ever felt like you do everything you can for your children and husband- making sure their needs are met, their dreams fulfilled- and you think to yourself that you are truly satisfied living in that role.
then one day you realize that [just how the older, wiser women warned] your children are growing (some leaving), your husband doesn't necessarily appreciate you in the way you feel you deserve, and aside from raising smart, respectful, ready-for-the-world children, you have virtually nothing. no fly business that you always thought you would have, no money to call your own, no degree that you were supposed to go back and get, no just-for-you accomplishments- besides the ones that came before hubby and children.
you look up and realize that although you FEEL [and probably THINK] you're still 25... your not. it dawns on you that even if you live to be 80, 80 isn't really that far off. you can remember 20 years ago as if it were merely 2 MONTHS ago, and you know for sure that if you do have until 80, the next 40 or 30 years will likely zoom by just as quickly. and what if your husband dies or leaves you, or your children grow up and eventually leave home? then what??
the panic kicks in, and while some of us actually get up off of our tails and do something, some of us don't.
obviously i am not simply throwing some arbitrary question out at you; i have owned this plight for quite some time. thankfully though, i was able to build up the strength and courage to join ranks with the former gals: i got up off of my butt and went back to work! i know this post probably makes me sound manic, but i'm not; i feel good. damn good, y'all! i had to find myself again because mu was m.i.a. i'm not that deep, so i know a whole lot of you feel where i'm coming from
and trust, i don't regret my choices of staying home with my babes, homeschooling, or even running [my husbands] restaurants because not only did i ask ALLAH for all of these things, but they benefitted us all. of course, the children being able to spend quality time with me and each other was tremendously beneficial on too many levels to even name, and homeschooling opened them up to worlds they never would have known in private or public school sectors. and while the restaurants liked to have broke a sista down (big-ups to all you restauranteurs out there!), it taught me business hands-on, and gave me confidence that i could not only cook for other people[and have them love and even pay for it!], but also teach them how to cook for themselves (2 businesses that i've started on my own).
oh, and one of the many things homeschooling has done for me (besides make me smarter, and a HUGE history buff) is teach me how to teach others. which brings me finally to the point of this post: i am back at the school i used to work, teaching grades 4, 5 and 7 (general ed.), as well as high school health. it is a private muslim school, and i'm very excited. when i worked there before the students/parents/administration liked my style of teaching, and over the past few years have asked me to consider coming back. it was really challenging at times, and (for the past year) i was trying to take some time off at home, not bogging the children down to one place while i worked. and so i REALLY debated going back, but i'm glad i did. the best thing is that the children come to work with me, so i don't have to stress about getting to the sitter before making it to work, and the 2 older ones will be in my class so i will still be teaching them.
to think, just a couple of weeks ago i was a borderline-desperate woman, and today... i can see mu breaking thru. isn't it something what prayer can do?
Monday, July 21, 2008
Aw'ight, now that that's done...
we can kick it. What's been goin' on?
I'll tell you what's on my mind today. Last night I was watching the Run's House episode that Vanessa poses for Maxim (one of favorite shows btw). Not only was I agreeing with Angela--the clothes WERE NOT 'tastful'-- but also Run. What is the problem with being concerned with what your children/ family are doing, even after after they are so-called grown?? And what's more, why is so wrong to actual care what your parents/family will say or think about your actions, and actually using that knowledge to help yourself come to a decision? Russel and Kimora's advice was off the hook to me.
In my opinion, the fact that we usually don't care what others think [we even flaunt this fact like it's something to be honored], only about our own irrational, momentary desires which comes from the lowest part of ourselves, is what has gotten us into the fixes we are in today. What fixes, you may be asking; well, honey, where to start? We can talk on a global, national, or personal level. From global warming, to the spread of AIDS, to too many babies being born out of wed-lock, to having a daughter posing near nude and being concerned little about how it will effect her family; 'selfishness', and the ability to go for what we want, when we want, just because we want has caused many a problem.
Now a know alot of y'all will think I'm going off the deep end, like 'Alright Mu, how'd you get this from that'.
(To be cont.---sorry!)
I'll tell you what's on my mind today. Last night I was watching the Run's House episode that Vanessa poses for Maxim (one of favorite shows btw). Not only was I agreeing with Angela--the clothes WERE NOT 'tastful'-- but also Run. What is the problem with being concerned with what your children/ family are doing, even after after they are so-called grown?? And what's more, why is so wrong to actual care what your parents/family will say or think about your actions, and actually using that knowledge to help yourself come to a decision? Russel and Kimora's advice was off the hook to me.
In my opinion, the fact that we usually don't care what others think [we even flaunt this fact like it's something to be honored], only about our own irrational, momentary desires which comes from the lowest part of ourselves, is what has gotten us into the fixes we are in today. What fixes, you may be asking; well, honey, where to start? We can talk on a global, national, or personal level. From global warming, to the spread of AIDS, to too many babies being born out of wed-lock, to having a daughter posing near nude and being concerned little about how it will effect her family; 'selfishness', and the ability to go for what we want, when we want, just because we want has caused many a problem.
Now a know alot of y'all will think I'm going off the deep end, like 'Alright Mu, how'd you get this from that'.
(To be cont.---sorry!)
Guess who's back???
Hey y'all!!! Man, have I had a tough time getting back here!
First, I was off line for awhile because we had no internet. Then, when I finally got it back, there was a new way to log into Blogger: get a g-mail account (which you probably already know). So of course, I obliged. But since I hadn't had time to blog, I forgot my sign-in information, which is where the real confusion started...
Well, anyway I'm back, and I'm so excited! So many things I've been wanting to share (still so little time to do so, but I will try much more often). But first thing's first: must get some music up in here!
First, I was off line for awhile because we had no internet. Then, when I finally got it back, there was a new way to log into Blogger: get a g-mail account (which you probably already know). So of course, I obliged. But since I hadn't had time to blog, I forgot my sign-in information, which is where the real confusion started...
Well, anyway I'm back, and I'm so excited! So many things I've been wanting to share (still so little time to do so, but I will try much more often). But first thing's first: must get some music up in here!
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
baffled
woman slashes 5-year old nephew's throat
i feel a bit depressed.
what is going on? so much murder, so much evil-- and so close to where my family rests our heads. and so many children dying... for no reason at all. what am i to do??
i feel a bit depressed.
what is going on? so much murder, so much evil-- and so close to where my family rests our heads. and so many children dying... for no reason at all. what am i to do??
Sunday, October 15, 2006
sorry, marvin
well, as you can hear, i had to do away with marvin. it was just starting to get on my last, chile. i get rid of one thing from my sidebar, everything is in chaos. i had to ask myself: is marvin worth having your entries cast way to the bottom of the page? well, the real marvin, yes, but the video i had (with no marvin in it whatsoever)... well, do you hear that?? yes, silence. i do miss the sweet sound of that voice, and sincerity of his words though. [you do know he wrote that song for me, right? picked it straight out of my heart...] maybe another time when i'm feeling a bit more patient i will try it again- siiigh...
___________________
belated ramadaan mubarik!
i've been so busy with life (and my other blog) that i hadn't checked in really all ramadaan. it's been good; ALLAH is always good to my family and me. i can hardly believe that it is nearly over! what's messin' wit dat?!
it seems like yesterday that i was making a shopping list of all the things i was going to cook and bake for suhur (early morning breakfast) and iftaar (dinner/ breaking of fast). no matter how i plan though suhur always winds up looking liker this
i'm not complaining because we could have nothing at all like so many people who go hungry all day everyday. i just always want to make it extra special, since it is an extra special month. maybe next year i'll better in executing my plans. now it's time to get those 'iyd gifts together-if i can afford them. i swear these children think we have a dollar tree out in th... omg, i think i just channeled my mother! time to go...
___________________
belated ramadaan mubarik!
i've been so busy with life (and my other blog) that i hadn't checked in really all ramadaan. it's been good; ALLAH is always good to my family and me. i can hardly believe that it is nearly over! what's messin' wit dat?!
it seems like yesterday that i was making a shopping list of all the things i was going to cook and bake for suhur (early morning breakfast) and iftaar (dinner/ breaking of fast). no matter how i plan though suhur always winds up looking liker this
i'm not complaining because we could have nothing at all like so many people who go hungry all day everyday. i just always want to make it extra special, since it is an extra special month. maybe next year i'll better in executing my plans. now it's time to get those 'iyd gifts together-if i can afford them. i swear these children think we have a dollar tree out in th... omg, i think i just channeled my mother! time to go...
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
they say it can happen anywhere-
and i guess it can.
can you believe that someone actually shot up those little amish girls? not only were they innocent (as children), but what on earth has the amish ever done to any body?? it's just too sad... too sad. what are we to do about and for our children?
may ALLAH protect us all from such hatred and evilness in our lives- amin.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061002/ap_on_re_us/amish_school_shooting
can you believe that someone actually shot up those little amish girls? not only were they innocent (as children), but what on earth has the amish ever done to any body?? it's just too sad... too sad. what are we to do about and for our children?
may ALLAH protect us all from such hatred and evilness in our lives- amin.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061002/ap_on_re_us/amish_school_shooting
Monday, September 25, 2006
she gettin' good, she gettin' good
those are the words my [stank] 14yo ds spoke because i actually know how to transfer my digitals onto the computer now- mind you they were
words of sarcasm as opposed to encouragement, god forbid. he just doesn't realize that i
am 34 now, and fiercer than ever- heyyy! [w/ a circle snap]
-------------------------------------------------
so anyway, like many of you i love to roam about this great 'blogosphere', and in doing so i am getting inspiration and confidence in so many ways. (ie, hear that dope music? oh, makes me wanna holla, way they do my life... thanks for the idea joey)
one thing that's been inspired is my sewing. i've been sewing for years, but for some reason never had the nerve to make a simple duvet i wanted for my comforters. well, after checking out miss nikki and how far she's come in NO TIME, i had to tell myself to stop buggin', and went on ahead and did it. the fabric a beautiful brocade that i got from our local discount fabric spot for $1.50/yard, and it feels so silky soft! it didn't go the full width of the comforter, so i put strips of the same black 'silky' polyester that's on the reverse on each side. so all that apprehension, for what? now i have 2 duvet covers in 1, and all it took was some time. easy-peasy, as they say.
now if i get this picture posting thing down, i'll show the accessories i'm adding as they get done. check y'all later...
*the headboard is actually part of one of those 'drop-in' bed frames that i got the other day for free from a freecycle member. freecycle rocks, yo!
Thursday, September 21, 2006
feels like heaven
not really anything in particular to write about, just trying to be good to my blog.
i'm sitting here with my sleeping baby on my lap, lights out, cd 101.9 playing in the background, its 'cool jazz' [as they call it] every so often coaxing me to a nod. it's so quiet; only my big boy and i are awake, and he's in the other room watching csi. you would think that i too would be in bed, but no way. this here is my time. my 2 middle ones are fast asleep, exhausted from another day of trying to break me. they shower me with kisses and claim that i am loved-even massage my achy, worn muscles at the end of the day- but i know they're secretly trying to drive me crazy. i mean, what else could it be?
no one in their right mind could need to be told 52,000 times [no exaggeration] to make up his bed, or to stop hitting his sister-EVERYday-right? and no sane human being could possibly want to lift her voice 600 octaves in the most nerve distorting screech ever NOT known to man, simply because her brother threw her pillow, or called her a boy. (and i won't even mention the teen--ooh, i tremble at even the thought of him. thank goodness dh takes him along to work sometimes, or i dunno...)
anyhow, this is my time and i intend to enjoy it for all that it's worth. after all, which blessing of my Lord shall i deny?
i'm sitting here with my sleeping baby on my lap, lights out, cd 101.9 playing in the background, its 'cool jazz' [as they call it] every so often coaxing me to a nod. it's so quiet; only my big boy and i are awake, and he's in the other room watching csi. you would think that i too would be in bed, but no way. this here is my time. my 2 middle ones are fast asleep, exhausted from another day of trying to break me. they shower me with kisses and claim that i am loved-even massage my achy, worn muscles at the end of the day- but i know they're secretly trying to drive me crazy. i mean, what else could it be?
no one in their right mind could need to be told 52,000 times [no exaggeration] to make up his bed, or to stop hitting his sister-EVERYday-right? and no sane human being could possibly want to lift her voice 600 octaves in the most nerve distorting screech ever NOT known to man, simply because her brother threw her pillow, or called her a boy. (and i won't even mention the teen--ooh, i tremble at even the thought of him. thank goodness dh takes him along to work sometimes, or i dunno...)
anyhow, this is my time and i intend to enjoy it for all that it's worth. after all, which blessing of my Lord shall i deny?
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Monday, September 18, 2006
ooh...
aw, man. y'all gonna haveta bare with me for a minute.
i was trying to be CUTE and put some tunes on here (w/o e-mailing people to death for their help because how hard could it be right?? you just copy and paste...). well, that part happened fine- and i was ecstatic- until i realized that my posts are way down the page now. UGH, i hate that!
anyway, i'm gonna see what i can do to change it, and post again soon. send me some good vibes though, and if possible, some ADVICE.
i was trying to be CUTE and put some tunes on here (w/o e-mailing people to death for their help because how hard could it be right?? you just copy and paste...). well, that part happened fine- and i was ecstatic- until i realized that my posts are way down the page now. UGH, i hate that!
anyway, i'm gonna see what i can do to change it, and post again soon. send me some good vibes though, and if possible, some ADVICE.
Friday, September 15, 2006
may ALLAH grant him paradise,amin.
a good friend of ours-the community- passed wednesday. i'm sure most are hurt by this, as much as we are.
brother russle was known for his cheesecakes, pound cakes, and bean pies, but i will remember him for even more. he had my back many'o times: before i was driving if he saw me walking with my 2 oldest babies he would always give me a ride; 9 years ago as a newly wed, thinking i would either leave my or kill my husband, he would listen and offer advice, urging patience; when i wanted a way to make a few extra bucks he didn't hesitate in showing me how to make individual strawberry shortcakes, and where to get everything i needed (he even spotted me my first trays, etc. from his own inventory). while those are fond memories of brother russle, they are not memories specified only to me- he was good to many, many people. i do have one that is mine alone though.
when i went into labor with my first daughter [6 years ago] we no longer had a vehicle. so of course my husband called one of his decades-long best friends to drive us the mile to the hospital; that day i saw a whole other side to russle. he was scared to death! i couldn't believe mista play all the time, beatin' up all the lil' boys in the neighborhood, 50+ year old butt was afraid. he was zooming so fast down the freeway in his little 2-door nova type car [don't know my cars], barely breaking for stop signs that we had to ask him to take it down a bit. 'you ain't haven't a baby in my car!' he said. we died laughing, but he was serious.
anyway, he got us there safely, pulling right into the ambulance entrance. i was so grateful that before they pushed me off in the hospital wheelchair, i promised brother russle that if i had a girl, i would name her after him.
may his grave be as wide as all the collective smiles he put on our faces, and inches he put in our pants.
laa huwla walaa quwata illa billah
"there is no strength nor power except by ALLAH"
amin
brother russle was known for his cheesecakes, pound cakes, and bean pies, but i will remember him for even more. he had my back many'o times: before i was driving if he saw me walking with my 2 oldest babies he would always give me a ride; 9 years ago as a newly wed, thinking i would either leave my or kill my husband, he would listen and offer advice, urging patience; when i wanted a way to make a few extra bucks he didn't hesitate in showing me how to make individual strawberry shortcakes, and where to get everything i needed (he even spotted me my first trays, etc. from his own inventory). while those are fond memories of brother russle, they are not memories specified only to me- he was good to many, many people. i do have one that is mine alone though.
when i went into labor with my first daughter [6 years ago] we no longer had a vehicle. so of course my husband called one of his decades-long best friends to drive us the mile to the hospital; that day i saw a whole other side to russle. he was scared to death! i couldn't believe mista play all the time, beatin' up all the lil' boys in the neighborhood, 50+ year old butt was afraid. he was zooming so fast down the freeway in his little 2-door nova type car [don't know my cars], barely breaking for stop signs that we had to ask him to take it down a bit. 'you ain't haven't a baby in my car!' he said. we died laughing, but he was serious.
anyway, he got us there safely, pulling right into the ambulance entrance. i was so grateful that before they pushed me off in the hospital wheelchair, i promised brother russle that if i had a girl, i would name her after him.
may his grave be as wide as all the collective smiles he put on our faces, and inches he put in our pants.
laa huwla walaa quwata illa billah
"there is no strength nor power except by ALLAH"
amin
Friday, August 25, 2006
oh yes! back on the block, baby!
oh, man, it's so good to be back; did ya miss me? my internet was down for awhile, but i'm back in business now. i must say, i had serious withdrawal symptoms though. if anything good came out of this it may be that i got LOTS of reading done. oh, and i found time to get back to my crocheting AND sewing. i made lots of outfits for myself, and dd. i made her this skirt we see in all the stores now, denim up top and another fabric flared at the bottom. she wanted one, but i refuse to spend lots of money on something 1) i can make myself (and probably better), 2) isn't worth all the money they ask for it. are you checking out the flimsy fabric they use for things now? it urkes me.
anyway she loves it and wears it all the time. it really makes me happy to know i've pleased her in such a way. i guess that means i'll be making her another 1- or 2.
besides purchasing fabric for clothes and such i already invision, i also have been straight HOARDING. there's a spot really close to me that sells fabric for $1-$1.50/ yard, and i don't mean junk fabric. i'm talking linen, wool, calico, fine polyester and african prints. i think i'm going to make some garments and sell them on-line- we'll see. i don't really know how to go about that in a productive way. not yet at least.
well let me go; must wake up dh. nice to be back, and i'll check in real soon.
anyway she loves it and wears it all the time. it really makes me happy to know i've pleased her in such a way. i guess that means i'll be making her another 1- or 2.
besides purchasing fabric for clothes and such i already invision, i also have been straight HOARDING. there's a spot really close to me that sells fabric for $1-$1.50/ yard, and i don't mean junk fabric. i'm talking linen, wool, calico, fine polyester and african prints. i think i'm going to make some garments and sell them on-line- we'll see. i don't really know how to go about that in a productive way. not yet at least.
well let me go; must wake up dh. nice to be back, and i'll check in real soon.
Thursday, February 23, 2006
okay-
why is it that shop-rite cashiers have to be so *#!@@#!!! GHETTO?! they just get on my last nerve!
#1) they are slower than molasses
#2) they are forever talking past you to the next cashier- which makes them move EVEN slower- about any and every ol' thing. can anybody say "discrete"??
and
#3) they have absolutely no problem not only cussin' (yeah, i said cussin') out a customer, but i have seen co-workers straight arguing in front of lines of people- LOUDLY.
where on earth are the supervisors??
i am sorry to say, i have never witnessed this behavior at any of the markets in other communities. in predominantly white, or latino neighborhoods, it's all good. even in white areas where many of the cashiers and customers are black, it's all good. so what's the problem? are our standards that low? why can we not get the same polite mannerisms that we would elsewhere? and don't even get me started on the fact bags don't have to be checked at the door at out of area markets, either-- thievery is every place, not just 'urbania'.
i'm saying, i know many of the cashiers are probably very nice people outside of tending to simple work tasks. certainly i know the pressures of dealing with the public, whether they're funky or nice. but really, somebody needs to round up these folks for an intensive work etiquette workshop because i'm sick of this mess. i mean, what does one have to do to recieve fair treatment around here, boycott?
#1) they are slower than molasses
#2) they are forever talking past you to the next cashier- which makes them move EVEN slower- about any and every ol' thing. can anybody say "discrete"??
and
#3) they have absolutely no problem not only cussin' (yeah, i said cussin') out a customer, but i have seen co-workers straight arguing in front of lines of people- LOUDLY.
where on earth are the supervisors??
i am sorry to say, i have never witnessed this behavior at any of the markets in other communities. in predominantly white, or latino neighborhoods, it's all good. even in white areas where many of the cashiers and customers are black, it's all good. so what's the problem? are our standards that low? why can we not get the same polite mannerisms that we would elsewhere? and don't even get me started on the fact bags don't have to be checked at the door at out of area markets, either-- thievery is every place, not just 'urbania'.
i'm saying, i know many of the cashiers are probably very nice people outside of tending to simple work tasks. certainly i know the pressures of dealing with the public, whether they're funky or nice. but really, somebody needs to round up these folks for an intensive work etiquette workshop because i'm sick of this mess. i mean, what does one have to do to recieve fair treatment around here, boycott?
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
how tempting
i
can turn a grey sky blue
i can make it rain
whenever i want it to
i can build a castle
from a single grain of sand
i can make a ship sail
on dry land
but my life is incomplete
and i'm so blue
'cause i can't get next to you...
uhn! yeah, chile. it ain't nuthin' like dustin' to some temptations up in here! talk about inspiration to get your body movin'. can't talk (talk?) much now 'cause i don't wanna lose focus of what i'm supposed to be doin', but i'll holla atcha latah, aw'ight? gots much to tell, hope i can fit it all in. respect!
can turn a grey sky blue
i can make it rain
whenever i want it to
i can build a castle
from a single grain of sand
i can make a ship sail
on dry land
but my life is incomplete
and i'm so blue
'cause i can't get next to you...
uhn! yeah, chile. it ain't nuthin' like dustin' to some temptations up in here! talk about inspiration to get your body movin'. can't talk (talk?) much now 'cause i don't wanna lose focus of what i'm supposed to be doin', but i'll holla atcha latah, aw'ight? gots much to tell, hope i can fit it all in. respect!
Monday, February 13, 2006
see what i have to deal with?
setting:
home after runing a few errands, then returning to pick my son up from our restaurant
characters:
mu (that would be me, devoted mother of 4, unselfishly giving of my blood, sweat and tears to ensure the proper developement of the children i love and adore so very, very much [did i mention devoted? just checking.]
bilal (8 yo bratty son who claims he loves me)
act 1, scene 1:
curtain opens with mu, devoted mother of 4, dressed in full halo and harp regalia giving the son who she struggled hours in excruciating pain to bring fourth into this world [8lb, 1oz he was] a chance to show a simple gesture of love to his dear old mother.
mu: bi-la-li boo, i missed you, baby. did you miss me?
bilal: [a bit non-chalantly]um, yes i thought about you a few times.
[then, hearing his mothers "no you didn't" chuckle at his response adds:]
you should be happy because i never think about you any other time.
the end.
mu says: hurry up and turn 18 so i can throw you out...
home after runing a few errands, then returning to pick my son up from our restaurant
characters:
mu (that would be me, devoted mother of 4, unselfishly giving of my blood, sweat and tears to ensure the proper developement of the children i love and adore so very, very much [did i mention devoted? just checking.]
bilal (8 yo bratty son who claims he loves me)
act 1, scene 1:
curtain opens with mu, devoted mother of 4, dressed in full halo and harp regalia giving the son who she struggled hours in excruciating pain to bring fourth into this world [8lb, 1oz he was] a chance to show a simple gesture of love to his dear old mother.
mu: bi-la-li boo, i missed you, baby. did you miss me?
bilal: [a bit non-chalantly]um, yes i thought about you a few times.
[then, hearing his mothers "no you didn't" chuckle at his response adds:]
you should be happy because i never think about you any other time.
the end.
mu says: hurry up and turn 18 so i can throw you out...
Friday, February 03, 2006
in the blink of an eye
on the first date
he thought i was a dummy
he had the nerve
to tell me he loved me
but of course
i knew it was a lie y'all
he undressed me
with his eye balls
tryin' to change
the whole subject
'cause everything he said
pertained to sex
so i dissed him
i said you's a sucker
get your dirty mind
out the gutter
you ain't gettin' paid
you ain't knockin' boots
you ain't treatin' me
like no prostitute
then i walked away
he called me a teaser
your on a mission kid
yo, he's a tramp...
aaahhh, that's my jawn...!
they were rockin' old school joints today on 98.7 kiss. immediately my mind was back to summer '87: hill manor, elna/malika, johnson avenue, boogie down productions, just turned 15. that was my first summer without my mother. i had graduated junior high, was living with my aunt, and about to enter 9th grade.forever was at my fingertips; never did i dream that 20 years would pass in a day...
he thought i was a dummy
he had the nerve
to tell me he loved me
but of course
i knew it was a lie y'all
he undressed me
with his eye balls
tryin' to change
the whole subject
'cause everything he said
pertained to sex
so i dissed him
i said you's a sucker
get your dirty mind
out the gutter
you ain't gettin' paid
you ain't knockin' boots
you ain't treatin' me
like no prostitute
then i walked away
he called me a teaser
your on a mission kid
yo, he's a tramp...
aaahhh, that's my jawn...!
they were rockin' old school joints today on 98.7 kiss. immediately my mind was back to summer '87: hill manor, elna/malika, johnson avenue, boogie down productions, just turned 15. that was my first summer without my mother. i had graduated junior high, was living with my aunt, and about to enter 9th grade.forever was at my fingertips; never did i dream that 20 years would pass in a day...
evolution
i've changed. alot.
at 33 i guess some things were bound to reform, but honestly i would have liked some to stay untouched. folks that i've run into during my journey- namely chicks that be trying to be all up in mine, na'mean- tend to force my cheek to turn though, forcing out another side of me.
now, i'm nice, caring, giving, respectful, always with a smile and good words; i'll truly go out of my way to help another. even with my extended family i am this way, and can't seem to suppress that inevitable streak of shyness that has followed me (thankfully) throughout my life. even my teenage son says i'm nice (when i'm not knockin' him up in his head, 'cause sometimes you have to save them from themselves, by any means necessary-- did i say he's a teenager?), and act more like a big sister sometimes.
with all that said, i will gladly kutt somebody when it comes to my family; nobody is unexpendable. didn't used to know if i had it in me, being an appreciative member of the 'sistahood' and all, but now i know. in the words of the great jill scott on her infamous work
' getting in the way', sometimes it's about principle and you just gotta whup somebody's ass.
my sister would be proud...
at 33 i guess some things were bound to reform, but honestly i would have liked some to stay untouched. folks that i've run into during my journey- namely chicks that be trying to be all up in mine, na'mean- tend to force my cheek to turn though, forcing out another side of me.
now, i'm nice, caring, giving, respectful, always with a smile and good words; i'll truly go out of my way to help another. even with my extended family i am this way, and can't seem to suppress that inevitable streak of shyness that has followed me (thankfully) throughout my life. even my teenage son says i'm nice (when i'm not knockin' him up in his head, 'cause sometimes you have to save them from themselves, by any means necessary-- did i say he's a teenager?), and act more like a big sister sometimes.
with all that said, i will gladly kutt somebody when it comes to my family; nobody is unexpendable. didn't used to know if i had it in me, being an appreciative member of the 'sistahood' and all, but now i know. in the words of the great jill scott on her infamous work
' getting in the way', sometimes it's about principle and you just gotta whup somebody's ass.
my sister would be proud...
___________________________________________
but enough with violence-
i don't know how in the world to do the side bar thing to show links, etc., but i have 2 other blogs.
plantedseedz is one, and is just me touching on my perspective of things i run into during the day (news, people, etc.); seeds that have been planted, get it? it could be called political i guess, as most things are (homelessness, racial identity), but it's not 'radical'. wel, not as yet anyway-lol.
the other is homeschoolvibes and is where i tell of things we encounter throughout our day. much of the time i will be giving advice or projects that i use or have used in my 8 or 9 years of homescooling.
o-kay, that's it. y'all try and have a good day, and let me know if you've been by!
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